Letting go...

His eyes remained glued to the Lufthansa Airlines flight that had just taken off from the International Airport and followed it till the same diminished into the horizons.

While on way back home, sitting in the rear seat of his car, tears swelled up his eyes as he managed to hide them from the driver looking through the rear view mirror. 

His thoughts drifted back to the cold winter night of December 23^rd when he received a call from his wife’s gynecologist asking him to rush to the hospital as his wife had to undergo an emergency procedure to have the baby. Alisa was born at 2.10 am local time. As he held the baby in his arms while wife recuperated in the operation theater for a few more hours, he had decided that he will not have any more kids. 

The one-child norm had been a part of his philosophy him from his early twenties. ``Children are responsibilities who need to be had as per your means and requirements,’’ he had once argued with his wife. While, Simran had always craved for at least two kids, she had to go with Amar when he said that they had just enough means to support and bring up one child in a good way.

Alisa slowly became an inseparable part of Amar’s life; he simply could not bear her go through any hardship to attain a certain end. ``Why don’t you give her that glass of milk at her table, rather than asking her to make an effort of coming to the dining table while she is studying,’’ he would ask Simran. 

His affection for the child grew to the extent that he changed his entire concept of having just one child. Whenever asked, he would simply say, ``I could not share my love for Alisa with any other child, even if it was my own.’’

One fine day, Alisa came home with news of this boy who was a batch-mate at her medical school, and he was planning to do specialization in a foreign country, ``So, you too are looking at such an option? What’s wrong with Indian institutes? You need not apply and my words are final,’’ declared an obviously jealous father.

In his single-track-thinking with respect to Alisa,  Amar had stopped realising that the girl had actually grown up to have a thinking and a mind of her own, she was 24 years old! He was deeply hurt, when the letter accepting Alisa’s application in an American University arrived, while he was rushing out for office and he simply took the u-turn towards home. 

Before Alisa was back from her college that day, Simran and Amar had finished rounds of discussions regarding the fact of life – one that of LETTING GO! An act that all of us have to do at some point of life or the other, and it is not all that difficult when accepted as a way of life.

Having handed over the letter to his only daughter, Amar had walked out of the drawing room leaving Alisa with Simran.

Can’t we make that marriage work?

It’s a simple thought that occurred while visiting some relatives last week.... The elderly lady, my dad’s aunt, gave a passing reference, ``You know your father was born 11 days after I came as a bride to their house.’’ That counts to sixty five long years of togetherness! And the oldies seemed blissfully happy. They had a fascinating charm to their relationship. 

Fast forward to this morning...A friend casually dropped in at my place. A smile that she entered our home with, started to fade when I spoke about her daughter. She broke down...``we have decided to separate with mutual consent and my husband and his family want to keep the baby with them.’’ Having known the couple as separate individuals for years, it is hard to believe. The words are still ringing in my ears...

Seeing families break these days, is becoming more and more common, but you feel the pain when it is someone close to you who is going through it. 

No comparisons to be made here. But just the thought – A beautiful complete story of those who are nearing the end of their life’s journey and another going into shambles just as it has begun to take complete shape....alas!

Two mature, good people giving in to the strength of their large inflated egos! Details need no brooding as any reason to justify such a dastardly decision, is crap. Three lives gone awry. Will the little girl who has no idea why she will not be living with both her parents as a family, ever value these relationships? What about the individuals themselves – where has all the love gone? Doesn’t it hurt badly to let go someone who has been a friend, companion and a  partner with whom you have shared a part of your life? Is the ego more important than the fulfillment of having a caring family, people whom you have loved to be with? 

Compromise, tolerance, trust and respect are among the few very important ingredients to make any relationship work. We do it every day with everyone and in every sphere of life, then why not today and here? 

There is no equation in marital relation, but there are definitely some additions, some subtractions with multiplications and divisions too! If we want to add strength to the marital bond, we add the positivity and subtract negativity. Dividing the pain and rough patches will definitely help multiply love and harmony.

Today, one of the best couples is drifting away from each other...and as they say - personal matters should not be interfered with, so, no one is taking the first step to tell the couple that - You both are wrong. Just sit down, set aside that ego and look at the whole thing once again. Is the reason for split good enough to put yourselves and a small child go through all the pain? You may not care for each other’s feelings but what is the fault of the child who will always ask why her family was not the same as her friends? 

Yes...you are right....I’m meeting them tomorrow...I strongly believe that this marriage can definitely be saved! This one’s just for the two wonderful people!

Celebrate Friendship Day Virtually: Old Relationship with New Style

Days are the gone when friendship day is only celebrated at real world’s places, as this time social networking sites are also ready to celebrate friendship day virtually with their million members. Friendship, a ten letter word, comprises all emotions of a relation. True friend shows you a path in deep sorrow, confusions and troubles. With this changing world friendship has changed its cover too.  The emotions of friendship are still the same but with new style. Many are ready to rock on this friendship day in virtual world of friendship.

We can always stay connected with our old friends in the virtual world of internet. Social networking sites are like a boon for those who are unable to meet their friends on this upcoming friendship day celebration. Virtual friendship has same old warmth but new dreams. We can say medium has changed but not the feeling. Many think friendship means trust and honesty and couldn’t be happen without spending time with friends in real world. But if our heart is true then we can make long term strong friendship.

Hectic life styles, time shortage, office overtime to get work completed, are some few reasons that are keeping your loving friends apart from your life. Internet provides you best medium to always being online and available for your friends. You can talk to them from anywhere no matter you are in the office or college. You can share your sadness and happiness anytime with them. It makes you feel that you have never been apart from your friends.

It does not matter how you are celebrating your friendship day, virtually or in the real world. The only thing that matters is your true feeling for your friend. Support your friends and show love to them, are the two main emotions that have importance to make your bond of friendship stronger. 

Life is not always a fairytale, face the reality

Fairytale continue to fascinate all whether child or adult. Thinking about wonderful things that we wish to have, always gives us nice feeling. Facing reality is not easy thing but necessary to live a better life.

Wake you up from this unnecessary day dreaming, as it is important to focus on your real life. Although making future plans what you want to do or what you want to be is good but you have to keep in mind that focus is vital.

Keep your fantasies to a minimum. Though it is pleasure to dream up wonderful things like imaginations with your favorite film star or things you wish to get, it is crucial to keep your day dreaming to a strict minimum. Don’t let your fantasies regulate your life and keep you away from real things.

Give importance what you have. Thinking all the time about the things we want, is tolerable at times, but sometimes, it can give us disappointment and displease since we do not have those stuff in real. Imagining about doing good jobs, higher marks in school can sometimes give positive motivation to do your desired works but sometimes it can make you upset. Thinking all the time about those things you don’t have can make you feel badly. Realize the plain things in life and their worth. Always remember this to feel positive.

Accept you as you are. If you want to change something in you then instead of thinking take action to make your life better. Day dreaming won't change anything. Face the reality and take step to make it better. Although shifting certain things in your life may be not easy, it is better to try to solve them than dreaming it in your thoughts.

End thinking about unrealistic fantasies all the time, it’s not a good thing to do. Many of us easily get extremely obsessed with what we read or watch in films, TV or books. TV and movie world is not a real world. It can’t solve our life problems.

Make new friends, talk to them, share your views and make yourself socially active. Those people who are not socially active often have much time to think unrealistic things. So avoid being alone all the time, make friends and increase your contacts.

If you feel you can’t stop thinking so much and your day dreaming is taking a severe dangerous step such as murder suicide etc. then visit a physiologist as soon as possible. It can be a serious mental problem. Live happy and enjoy every moment of life.

Your first love relationship starts with you only

Why people feel lonely and sad? Why they always need somebody to fill their loneliness? When they meet someone special, they attract to him and make a quick love relationship. They define it love. Sharing thoughts, feelings and emotions are necessary to make a love relationship alive. But when is the last time you show love to yourself? Where is the “you” among your all relationships? All of you don’t do anything to make your relationship with yourself strong and always alive.

Sit and think for a while about real love. Real love doesn’t need anything. But then why you need someone to fill the gap of your life? Don’t think that there is always a need of someone to live happy, to feel happy, and to be loved. You can love yourself and can be sufficient unto yourself. You can be happy with yourself and real love is too possible with yourself.  

You are always feel uncertain and anxiety whether the other’s love for you true or not. It means it’s not the real and true love what you are doing to other. If it is real then why you have worries about it? Let it happens and enjoy it fully. But you can’t able to do this because there is some uncertainty because we can’t read other’s mind and heart what he thinks and desire. Your love is just your need. You want your lover to be with you always to fill your emptiness. You are both just using each other as a thing. 

When the love is finished you realize that it was false. Only false love comes to an end. It’s not like that your love had not any truth but you were both not capable to feel and grasp that truth. You need love but you are not able to feel it. 

You all don’t know to love yourself if you are then rather using anybody, you share love with him. And you feel always thankful to the person for receiving your love with heart. If you love yourself somebody else also loves you. If you are happy with yourself other people also feel happy in your company. Make yourself aware and make your heart realize about the love that is in your heart and it’s not your need it’s your gift given by the God. Make the love relationship alive and share the love with the world.

Don’t let Love to be a self-destructive emotion rather use its energy to enjoy life

Love is like a beautiful and happy feeling given by God but unfortunately not for all. Those who find their true and long-lasting love, they are considered as luckiest people of the universe but what about those who face a bad love relation and make themselves out of rest of the world. Many people think same about love like the song “love is like a razor that leaves your soul to bleed”
Everyone here who believed himself in love, go through big emotional upheavals and is more habitually gloomy and unfocused to a certain extent than delighted and calm. Age factor affect people’s feeling about love time to time. In young age, a person share fine points of his relationship and his happy feelings to his friends but as a person grow mature, he wish to share the soreness and uneasiness of love and exchange some suggestion and guidance. Why love brings aged people so much unhappiness

Young people look as if so much more at ease in and out of a love relationship. They are capable to put to one side their love life to focus on their studies and career. To them, saga and love are a part of life, to be shelved when more urgent desires call for notice. If a love relationship give them pain and suffocation, they completely capable of getting out of that relation, and walking on to a new path. The adult age group but, still fixed in the Romeo-Juliet form seems to not be capable to do the same with their painful relationship as youngster do. Their stakes are superior, emotional feelings run deeper in heart and dedication more set in glue. 

 

The aged people are eagerly ready to explore and enter relationships, but they have not been clever to learn the technique of leaving a relationship if it doesn’t work. Youngster in love-relationship, rather than make themselves out from rest of the world, become more inclusive and keep touch with their friends, thus enjoying a lot of peer support. An older couple normally builds a separate and secret world for themselves, shutting out others. They are very clandestine and cautious about their love lives.

Sometimes love becomes a deadly magnetism that leads you inescapably towards devastation. Now the question is raised “Why demolish the happiness of life in the hope of an indescribable, dreamlike, everlasting love? Rather than let love to invasion your life as a deeply emotional and upsetting extreme thing, limit the intensity to the little time you spend together and use the resultant energy to fuel the rest of your life and you will find that there is a lot more pleasure and accomplishment to be found in life than love alone.

Nobody today can show 100% loyalty to you or your concerns. Love, rather than a hearty commitment, can be a little energy to empower the rest of your life. If you can love like that, you will be able to live your life fully.

Digital love Relationship: Love at First Byte - Social Networking Rocks

 

With the advances of digital technologies, Love-relationship now no longer has any restrictions. Meet someone new online on social networking sites or have feast with your loved-one from miles away, is all achievable in the digital time. Social networking sites and communication apparatuses of the digital time present couples a lot of opportunities to chat thus love relationship has been changed into a digital practice.

Couples just switch on their personal computers or laptops and webcams and turning out the other things of world entirely, start chatting face to face, even though being in poles apart. Online social networking sites such as Orkut, Facebook are very famous among young generations. People like to rejoice their relationship by status updates on these sites. They share their pictures, news and experiences. They love to tell their life story to online community. Social networking sites make available them a stage to convey what’s going on in their mind. People are exchanging virtual gifts between themselves.

Digital age technology makes the world shrinking. Internet gives them facility to talk face to face free of charge. Couples are fixing dates on internet. Physical separation is very painful to some couples; internet is like God to them that giving some relief in their sad times. Internet makes easier to get someone to fall in love with. It made world a playground. People are living their digital lives their own way.

Sometimes the impacts of digital love relationship can be harmful. Digital love relationships can hurt you if you don’t consider some harmful aspects of this kind of love relationship. So, before talking to a person on net, make ensure yourself that with whom you are talking is an honest person. Age, photograph can be wrong sometimes. Because, most people don’t put their own photographs but of their friends on social networking sites. Don’t trust the other person’s age. May be with whom you are chatting is someone else not your friend.

Love is unique in its way. 

Digital love relationship is not always wrong but not able to give you real happiness. Computer is just a tool not a living thing. So, stop living an online life. Meet your loved one in your real world if possible. Love is a true and alive feeling not digital feeling. Someone special of your life whom you met on a social networking site or in real life, try to meet that person personally for making a strong and honest love-relationship.